Bad Boy Abroad

I went on a date with this guy from America. I’ve got a serious soft spot for that accent… ok, who am I kidding, it’s my kryptonite.

He was confident and charming.

But, before long, I noticed he kept looking down… like down down (not just at my strategically placed cleavage!). And I’m not talking about a quick glance, but full-on staring.

At first, I thought maybe he was checking out my shoes, which were, in my humble opinion, very cute. But no… it was my feet he was interested in.

Turns out, his mum had told him that a woman who takes care of her feet and toenails takes care of herself in general. And so, he asked if he could see my feet.

I didn’t know if I was on a date or in the middle of some foot fetish fantasy, but I thought, “Why not?” I’m all for learning about new things, and truthfully, at this point, I was curious to see what else he’d say or do. So, I just went with it.

And… he was thrilled. I’m talking about the kind of excitement that should probably come with a confetti cannon. But hey, who am I to judge? Everyone’s got their thing, right?

Then the conversation took an unexpected turn (because up until now, it hadn’t been unexpected!). He casually asked, “Have you ever been in trouble with the law?”, as if it was standard date chat. I answered, “No”, and returned the question. With a casual shrug, he replied, “Yeah, but it was nothing major,” and then quickly changed the subject.

So, naturally, I went home and did what any self-respecting person would do - a deep dive into Google. Well, turns out, this guy had a colourful past. He’d been to prison… twice! Once for stabbing someone (thankfully, not fatally, but still), and another for armed robbery. Minor incidents, right?

Needless to say, there was no second date.

But, if I’m being totally honest, part of me wonders what could’ve happened if I’d gone along with it. Maybe we’d have started a quirky Netflix series, Love After Lockup, or, maybe I would have had conjugal visits in my future.

Because let’s be honest, there’s something strangely alluring and often irresistible about a bad boy… even if we know they just aren’t good for us.

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There’s something undeniably magnetic about bad boys. They often exude an aura of mystery and excitement, offering a sense of adventure that might feel like an escape from the routine of everyday life.

For many women, this sense of unpredictability and the thrill of the unknown can feel irresistible. A bad boy is often perceived as someone who is fearless, unapologetically themselves, and living on the edge - traits that can be both exciting and intoxicating.

However, while these qualities may draw us in, they are often the very traits that make bad boys a poor choice for a long-term partner.

Beneath the bravado, bad boys often lack the emotional maturity, stability, and commitment that form the foundation of a healthy, fulfilling relationship.

They can be unpredictable, selfish, and, at times, even destructive. Their inability or unwillingness to commit, combined with their tendency to make reckless decisions, makes them a dangerous gamble when it comes to long-term happiness.

It’s important to recognise that what women truly need in a relationship is not a thrill ride, but someone who is grounded, stable, and emotionally available. A partner who is supportive, reliable, and committed to building a secure and loving future offers a much more fulfilling and sustainable connection.

When we focus on being with someone who is emotionally mature and stable, we create a relationship where trust, respect, and mutual growth can flourish. It’s easy to get caught up in the allure of the bad boy, but when we prioritise our emotional wellbeing and future happiness, we realise that it’s the good, grounded partner who is truly worth our time and love.